Ker sem se zadnjih nekaj prispevkov šel gejevskega aktivista, je morda prav, da se lotim še znanstvene podlage, s katero je mogoče zavrniti blebetanje religioznih norcev o katastrofalnem vplivu življenja v istospolnih družinah na otroke. Pa ne gre samo za religiozne prenapeteže ala Ljudmila Novak, pri vprašanju otrok se ustavi marsikomu, ki zase sicer meni, da je liberalen. Joj, nimam nič proti poroki, sam otrok jim pa ne dam!
Na spletu je – kot pri vseh temah – na to temo najti vse mogoče, zato je selekcija še kako potrebna. Najlažje jo opravimo tako, da se naslonimo na uveljavljene institucije in znanstvene revije.
Mogoče bo koga presenetilo, toda raziskovanje vpliva življenja v istospolnih družinah ni ravno od včeraj; prve raziskave – sicer omejene zaradi takratnih družbenih razmer – so se v ZDA, kjer naj bi v tovrstnih družinah danes živelo med 3 do 10 milijonov otrok (gre za ocene), pojavile pred približno 30 leti (pa gre “argument”, da je potrebno še malo počakati na… ne vem kaj; znak iz nebes?).
Tovrstne raziskave so številnim ameriškim strokovnim združenjem omogočile, da na to temo oblikujejo načelna stališča, konsenz v posameznih strokah.
American Psychological Association
In summary, there is no evidence to suggest that lesbian women or gay men are unfit to be parents or that psychosocial development among children of lesbian women or gay men is compromised relative to that among offspring ofheterosexual parents. Not a single study has found children of lesbian or gay parents to be disadvantaged in any significant respect relative to children ofheterosexual parents. Indeed, the evidence to date suggests that home enviro ments provided by lesbian and gay parents are as likely as those provided by heterosexual parents to support and enable children’s psychosocial growth. Lesbian & Gay Parenting
American Academy of Pediatrics
A growing body of scientific literature demonstrates that children who grow up with 1 or 2 gay and/or lesbian parents fare as well in emotional, cognitive, social, and sexual functioning as do children whose parents are heterosexual. Children’s optimal development seems to be influenced more by the nature of the relationships and interactions within the family unit than by the particular structural form it takes. Technical Report: Coparent or Second-Parent Adoption by Same-Sex Parents
Raziskava, ki jo je naročila kanadska vlada
An academic study into the impact of children being raised by gay parents found that children living with two mothers have the same social competence as a child raised by a straight couple. The 2003 report was only released by Canada’s Justice Department after a freedom of information request by its author. Gay parents just as good, government study finds
Primerjava 15 raziskav, opravljenih med leti 1981 – 1994
Children growing up in same-sex parental households do not necessarily have differences in self-esteem, gender identity, or emotional problems from children growing up in heterosexual parent homes. Study: Same-Sex Parents Raise Well-Adjusted Kids
Tako bi lahko naštevali v nedogled, a bodi dovolj, saj je zaključek jasen, kajne? Kdor želi še naprej opletati, da so tovrstne družine božja šiba za otroke, se mora nasloniti na kaj drugega kot znanost.
A do razlik vendarle pride
Precej razburjenja pa je leta 2005 povzročila raziskava, ki sta jo opravila Judith Stacey in Timothy J. Biblarz, sicer odkrita zagovornika t.i. alternativnih družin, ki sta raziskovalcem očitala, da so iz strahu, da bi morebitne razlike med otroci iz heteroseksualnih in istospolnih družin lahko zlorabili konzervativci, znake za te namerno ali nenamerno potisnili na stranski tir. In kakšne so te razlike?
Stacey and Biblarz found some evidence that children in gay households are more likely to buck stereotypical male-female behavior. For example, boys raised by lesbians appear to be less aggressive and more nurturing than boys raised in heterosexual families. Daughters of lesbians are more likely to aspire to become doctors, lawyers, engineers and astronauts.
In addition, heterosexual mothers tend to encourage sons to participate in historically “masculine” games and activities – such as Little League – and daughters in more “feminine” pursuits – such as ballet. In contrast, lesbian mothers had no such interest – their preferences for their children’s play were gender neutral.
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In two studies, a greater number of young adult children raised by lesbians had participated in or considered a same-sex relationship or had an attraction to the same sex. However, statistically, they were no more likely to identify themselves as lesbian, gay or bisexual.
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Teenage boys raised by lesbians are more sexually restrained, less aggressive and more nurturing then boys raised in heterosexual families.
Adolescent and young adult girls raised by lesbian mothers appear to be more sexually adventurous and less chaste. Sons of lesbians display the opposite – boys are choosier in their relationships and tend to have sex at a later age than boys raised by heterosexuals.
It is more common for both lesbian moms to be employed, to earn similar incomes and to cut back on their hours of paid work in order to nurture young children. Some research indicates that egalitarian parenting contributes to child well-being, Stacey said.
Same-sex couples proved better at managing disagreements and anger than did comparable heterosexual married couples. Research suggests that parental conflict may be one of the most significant sources of difficulty for children, Stacey said. Sociology: Study examines gender roles of children with gay parent
Ugotovitve so za zagovornike tradicionalnih, “stereotipnih” spolnih vlog, ki nam jih je domnevno iz onostranstva dal kar bog lastnoročno, seveda enako strašljive, kot če bi ugotovili, da istospolne družine proizvajajo male sociopate. Če meniš, da je ženski mesto za štedilnikom, da se zanje nekatere aktivnosti in poklici ne spodobijo, da je že “eksperimentiranje” s homoseksualnimi odnosi hud greh, je tak zaključek pač logičen.
Ni pa logičen, še manj dopusten za sodobne, pluralne družbe, ki zagovarjajo enakopravnost spolov, osebno svobodo in enake možnosti za vse. Tudi zato ista avtorja zaključujeta:
But, researchers said, many of the differences are those that any democratic society should welcome.
Za zaključek samo še odgovor na večni strah, da bodo ti otroci nepovratno “poškodovani” zaradi socialne stigme, ki jo trenutno še prinašajo istospolne družine:
While all children probably get teased for one thing or another, children with gay parents may experience a higher degree of teasing and ridicule. It is impressive then that their psychological well-being and social adjustment does not significantly differ, on average, from that of children in comparable heterosexual-parent families. Exploring how lesbian and gay parent families help children cope with stigma could prove helpful to all kinds of families.”